carol

If the only reason I printed our conversation to the lawyer before is because you said I could tell my brother about using Grant.
I didn't do that out of hate but because I didn't want him to fuck up anything anymore than what he did.
You need to read my blog about Don't Judge anyone until you walk in there shoes.....
At the Begin it might sound like its wrong but that's just me telling my story and at the end it will tell you how I am talking to my brother and telling him, theres his answer....
I know why you left the kids behind trust me at 1st I didn't understand why and then it just got clear to me.
I never heard you cry at my house.
I asked you once when we were drunk at your apartment and Lalo and I were fighting. We were sitting on your stairs and I asked you, why did you come back? I never wanted you to come back I wished and prayed that you never showed up at the air port. But you did at that time I wasn't sure why you really left cause you didn't tell us and Jr never said anything. all we knew was that he had fucked up. You could read all my blogs and you will see that I want you to stick to your plan, I know one day you will come back and take the kids away. I always tell Lil. Daniel when I see him crying for you. I hug all of them and make sure that they know you will be back. I don't and I will never talk bad about you to your kids. If I'm helping my brother with the kids taking them to the doctors and enrolling them in school is because I want too. I don't like to be told what I should be doing I like to do things cause I want to.
I don't know why you hate me so much, I never did anything wrong at least I don't thing so and if I did just tell me.
Do you really think I sit here and care that your having fun I'm glad that you are.
My cousins ask about you all the time and all I say is girl what ever she is doing is having fun and working. I don't think that is a bad thing cause you are. I also tell them how you blog about how much you miss your kids. But I'm sure like always people only say what they want to say. I tell everyone the same thing she is going to come back for the kids and we are probably never going to see them again.
Don't always believe what you hear on less you have that person or persons in front of you....

Otis and charles days!

Well this week my nephews have been staying with me,
This week I had to take Otis the youngest to the doctor.
He got 5 shots but took it like a champ, he kept asking me Tia Rosa is it going to hurt?
We kept telling him just don't look at the shot and you will be fine. My oldest son Andrew kept telling him just don't think it will hurt you and it won't... lol...
Kids are so funny this days.
Charles got 4 shots and he also took it like a champ.
Next week kids go to the dentist and I have to finish enrolling Otis in school. All we needed was he's shots. He is so excited about school.
Man just two more weeks and they all go to school, I can't wait!
Charles and Otis always use to fight but now after there day to the doctor together they have been getting along very well. they even sleep in the same bed now, wow I'm am so glad that they are bonding:) we will see how they will do the 1st day of school I really wish I could take both of them:( but I will only be taking my boy Charles and my brother will take my nephew Otis.

Don't Judge till you walk in there Shoes

Someone very old told me today, "Don't Judge till You Walked in there Shoes."
Very true I said
So here it goes Brother I am very sorry cause I don't know what your going through and your right in so many ways.
We as a mother should take responsibility and as you as a father.
I love you both so I can't be on your side or hers
I don't know what people think or what goes through there mind
You ask me if I would had left my kids?
My answer is no but she is not me.
I have been in a abusive relationship were I have had busted lips, black eyes, kicked in my back/stomach, thrown around and slapped around.
I was always asked why did you stay with him? My answer was I don't know, I knew I was worth more but I had no one to tell. I needed help to get out or maybe I just loved him so much that I thought things would change.
You ask if I ever tried to leave? Yes I did and I would come back maybe cause I was weak
You ask did I have kids? Yes I did at the time
You ask did I take them? Yes I did cause there was no way I would leave them there with him
You ask why not? Because I always felt that he would not take care of them
You ask why it is there dad? Yes but he has never been a father were he would show them love you

So there Brother that's the reason why she left them with you, you have been a loving father and she knew you would be there for them. So don't question her why, at the time it felt like the right thing to do. I love you both so please take care. This goes to everyone, Don't Judge Till you Walk in There Shoes.

my Juliet is sad

its been a while but only cause I have been moving
yes its true we moved out of that house where so much has happened
My juliet is going through a really hard time
she thinks that having curves are a bad thing
she don't want to go to school
shes always sad at home
she never comes out of the room
I don't know how to get her to understand that its ok if she don't look like a stick
this really sucks cause shes not her self
I don't want her to be depressed anymore
I'm scared to think that it could get worst
I pray that she will stop thinking about it but thats all she talks about now